It was some time ago that I was encouraged to write my own obituary. I've thought about what I could say many times, but just didn't feel comfortable saying the kind of things I hoped would be said about me. Besides, I struggled to find the motivation to prepare my own obituary when death was the last thing on my mind.
Just when I was feeling most complacent, real life events reared their ugly head. My body began to betray me. Eating became difficult and painful. My energy was sapped. When the doctor confirmed that surgery, sooner than later was imminent, my mindset about that obituary assignment changed. In addition, a dear friend, six months younger than me, died suddenly. To top it off, my stepmother died of liver failure. I began to thoughtfully consider how I wanted to be remembered. Would I have a lasting legacy or simply be forgotten like my parents had been?
I immediately thought of my miraculous little grandsons. I had so many plans for the things we would do together. I wanted them to have fond memories of their Grandma Keethler. So, before my surgery, we headed to San Diego for what I feared may be my last visit with them. I made a point of being there when they first opened their eyes in the morning and when they closed them at the end of the day. I made sure to get my picture taken with them, just as I had done with my grandmother. I tried to be there for Katie too, and began to see more clearly the remarkable woman she had become.
When I was finally wheeled into surgery, it wasn't the boys or Katie that occupied my thoughts after all. It was Bob. He was walking beside me and would be there when I woke up, just as he had been for nearly 48 years now. He has been the constant in my life for so long that sometimes I think our brains have merged. My heart overflowed with gratitude that he had chosen me all those years ago. I simply wasn't ready to leave him yet. It was then that I felt certain that this was not the end that I had feared. I would come back from this surgery and we would get to continue growing old together. God would continue to light our way, just as He always had.
So, I guess my obituary wouldn't be so difficult to write after all. I would want it said that I was a devoted wife, a kind friend and a recipient of blessings beyond measure. I ended my days in gratitude.