CARNEY – Joan Barbara. 86. Born February 5, 1934, died September 3, 2020. Loving wife, the most dedicated of mothers, proud grandmother and the best of friends. She is survived by her husband of 65 years, Milton S. Carney; sister Ellen Pulleyblank Coffey; son Alexander D and his wife Cathy Ann; son Jared Matthew and his wife Deirdre Ellin Wallace with children Allegra Orly and Carmen Avra. A remarkable woman, who gave so much to so many, and never asked for anything in return.
Joan was born in Jersey City, NJ to Abraham and Sylvia (Dorfman) Lightdale. After attending the University of North Carolina and Columbia University undergrad, where she met Milton. She attended New York University for graduate school, receiving a Master’s Degree in Communications. For a time, she was an actress and made many lasting friendships from that period of her life. She soon embarked on a career that blended policymaking and grassroots activism. A passionate advocate for education reform she became a force locally and across the country. Joan was a fighter for parent empowerment, teacher excellence, open classrooms and Open Corridor Education in New York City public schools and an active community organizer on the Upper West Side of Manhattan and beyond. As an influential leader in the political arena, Joan was President of the United Parents Association of New York when it was the largest such group in the country. She served as Executive Director of The Foundation for the Creative Community and as the New School for Social Research’s first Head of Distance Learning. Joan was a teacher of teachers and a pivotal member of the Coalition of Essential Schools efforts nationally.
Well known for her cooking and love of hosting gatherings large and small, Joan was vivacious and always took things in stride. Her sense of humor was generous and she was available to help anyone in need. A keen Scrabble player, she also taught her sons how to play poker. She also taught a number of their friends how to swim. Joan could also lounge in a pool for hours with the best of them and was an expert salad maker.
Joan loved the North Fork of Long Island, which she called home for many years. Every summer was a celebration of life alongside her; endless repasts, beachcombing, swimming in the bay and ocean and sharing the fun with family and friends.
Later in her life Joan became a somewhat reluctant Californian. Nevertheless she found ways of embracing Los Angeles and reveled in being a part of her granddaughters’ growth. Everyone who knew her was touched by her kindness, curiosity and intelligence. Anyone who was lucky enough to call Joan a friend was all the happier for the privilege.
In lieu of flowers or food, the family asks that contributions in her memory be made to the Motion Picture Television Fund via the link provided.